Back to December?

1. It was a very young relationship..and yes, I was the one who decided to let go from the sensation of first-and-thirst relationship.  We just need to see the world first, if it’s written.. we’ll meet again,for sure

2. Sahabat yang memutuskan untuk pergi daripada bermain api dengan hati. Berhenti, membalikan muka dan menukar waktu-waktu pendewasaan yang tak ternilai itu..dengan sebuah perasaan lain; di hati yang lain.

3. I don’t know whether I should call this as a mistake or else…but, I did can feel the breeze for some little. Maybe this just a breeze for me to start opening the door..stop living a rough road all by myself, learn again how to share the burdens…

4. Just a matter of finding the answer of  ”Why couldn’t I realize it like some moments earlier?”.  Then it’s gone by just a swirl of the wind; by the time I realized what I had. Well, I haven’t even said congratulation for his new tittle…just don’t know how to say; to start things all over again..

5. While some others just came and passed by…

I’m so glad you made time to see me
How’s life? Tell me, how’s your family?
I haven’t seen them in a while

You’ve been good, busier than ever
We small talk, work and the weather
Your guard is up, and I know why

Because the last time you saw me
Is still burned in the back of your mind
You gave me roses, and I left them there to die

So this is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying I’m sorry for that night
And I go back to December all the time

It turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you
Wishing I’d realized what I had when you were mine
I go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I go back to December all the time

These days, I haven’t been sleeping
Staying up, playing back myself leaving
When your birthday passed, and I didn’t call

Then I think about summer, all the beautiful times
I watched you laughing from the passenger side
And realized I loved you in the fall

And then the cold came, the dark days
When fear crept into my mind
You gave me all your love, and all I gave you was goodbye

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile
So good to me, so right
And how you held me in your arms that September night
The first time you ever saw me cry

Maybe this is wishful thinking
Probably mindless dreaming
But if we loved again, I swear I’d love you right

I’d go back in time and change it, but I can’t
So if the chain is on your door, I understand

This is me swallowing my pride
Standing in front of you, saying I’m sorry for that night
And I go back to December

It turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you
Wishing I’d realized what I had when you were mine
I go back to December, turn around and make it alright
I go back to December, turn around and change my own mind
I go back to December all the time, all the time

***

“People change. Feelings change. It doesn’t mean that the love once shared wasn’t true and real. It simply just means that sometimes when people grow, they grow apart.”

Learnings loaded into my mind; and the rests are just CLOSED for good. I need no Back to December (or Jan,Feb,March,etc..) for more. There’s just no use being swayed by the past. They’re just passed. I’m living my today and tomorrows. 

So now..let’s have unlimited better days with him, cause this has to be a good life  :)

Bakhtiar Rizki Akbar/Natasha Virzana

“To be brave is to love someone unconditionally, without expecting anything in return”  

April 30th, 2011